A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. Psalm 68:5
Daddy Issues: We’ve all got’em.
All throughout the bible God uses the words love and everlasting mercy to describe His character. And he does this, so that we know that He is love, and cares about us before us being convinced that God is a condemning and totalitarian rule type of God. God actually wants to relate to us by giving us confidence in Him, in His flawless and incorruptible character: God does not change. And desires to be our loving, correcting and attentive father. Maybe you grew up with a father (like I did), maybe you have a step father, or maybe you don’t have a father at all; maybe because he passed away, left you in your youth or never claimed you as their child. Inclusively, there are people who do not have a mother or father altogether. Like those raised by their relatives, or by single mothers or single fathers. There are also situations like blended families, where a new marriage bring children from a different marriage to become one, and there are others who are raised by the government in foster or facility care. Even though God is all powerful, and holy, and a righteous judge He wants us to know Him as our father. God could have left us to rot in hell, but He came up with a redemption plan in sending His only begotten Son. God sent His only son, to further His point in that we are worth more than the fact that He had to suffer in offering His own child to gain us as His children.
We know what a mother is and what a father is, and these two people that we meet first in life or do not meet at all- shape our life, personality and understanding of the world. Ideally in a perfect world, an earthly father would give us these basic needs of being loved. We all share common human needs, like:
- to be loved
- to receive affection
- to feel protected
- to be valued
If we do not have a mother or father to show us love, or give us those basic needs, God wants you know today that He will and He wants to. God gave us an innate understanding for motherhood and fatherhood, we suppose that these needs will be supplied by their roles. God also gave us the desire in our hearts to have a good father! But, often, in every generation of humanity and in every society in the world we find that our parents are imperfect. If you speak to people you will learn that none of us have that perfect father that we envisioned or longed for. This nobody’s fault, except for Satan’s given authority over mankind: sin.
When Jesus taught the disciples to pray, He taught them to address God as “Our Father, who is in heaven‘, and the apostle Paul says that “we are no longer slaves to sin, but we can come to God and identify being God’s children in calling Him “Abba“, father in Hebrew. This is in Romans 8:15, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father. God is spirit, but He chose to call Himself father because of it’s masculinity, which denotes authority, strength, protection, and provision.
No one has to be without a perfect Father.
God knows that men can be fathers and be imperfect, faulty, negligent, selfish, absent and of poor character. God also knows that we can have men in our lives in place to assume the role of fathering us, but it doesn’t guarantee they will be responsible in their God given roles. Some parents are unforgiving, nagging, abusive or manipulators. Some parents are physically present, but emotionally unavailable. Some parents lack wisdom and understanding, so a conversation never takes place or rarely betters the relationship and instead harms it. Some are unable to guard their hearts and separate their attitudes towards life, work, relationships and etc., from directly affecting their children. As our father God wants the best for us, He desires:
- to give him all of our cares and worries
- to enjoy spending time with us
- to protect us
- to give us affection by blessing us in discreet and very personal ways
- he wants to be our shoulder to cry
- our counselor and instructor
Tomorrow I will go a little deeper, on the effects of having a missing father as a woman and as a man. The effects are profound. But remember, these effects are over-ridden in God: no one has to be without a perfect Father.
Father God, may this season bring us to fully know you as Abba, our father. May we all know to rely on you, and seek you for the love, attention or acceptance we are missing or have missed from our human parents and let us be so convicted that nothing, no trial, no demon, no carnality, be able to move us from your love. In Jesus name, Amen.